Funny Birthday Wishes EVER :Funny Birthday Quotes | Birthday Wishes, Messages & Images.A Birthday is the special celebration of everyone’s life. Birthday Quotes are touch with heart full words. Birthday is coming and goes every year. Funny Birthday Quotes are also at times Funny Birthday Wishes. You need to add Happy Birthday Wishes from the soul to Birthday Quotes to make them more personal, which will make all the difference to your loved ones.
Funny Birthday Wishes EVER
Happy birthday! They say that age is just a number. Yea right – and jail is just a room!”
Don’t be bummed about your birthday! You know what they say: it’s better to be a year older than to be one month late. Happy birthday!”
Happy birthday! Today, I would advise you to be nice to your kids. Remember, the older you get, the closer you get to having them choose a nursing home.”
Wait – you’re how old today? You’re so lucky you’re not a dog. They would have put you down by now. Oh, well! Happy birthday!”
Congratulations! You only look one year older than you did on your last birthday.”
Happy birthday! You’re how old? Oh man – that’s like, dead in dog years.”
I would be so much more into your birthday if it were my birthday.”
You know, I would be a whole lot more excited about you turning one year older if I was in your will. Happy birthday!”
Happy birthday! Let’s celebrate the anniversary of your clever escape from the womb.”
As you get older, there are three important things that happen. First, you lose your mind. I can’t remember the other two. Happy birthday!”
Happy birthday! Remember this today: if you lick all the frosting off a cupcake, it becomes a muffin – and muffins are healthy.”
Happy birthday! After seeing all the candles on your cake, I seriously hope that you topped off your fire insurance.”
Happy birthday to the one person I hope is still around when the iPhone 547 comes out.”
A “few” years ago, you were smart, handsome and young. Today, you’re just an old fart. Happy birthday!”
Happy birthday! May the number of candles outnumber your gray hairs.”
Funny Birthday Wishes
Happy birthday! May you live to be so old, people start wondering if you’re the walking dead.”
Here’s to you on your birthday! May you live to be so old, you sincerely wish you were dead.”
Happy birthday! Don’t let a 27-year old Olympic gold medal winner make you feel like a failure on your birthday.”
Happy birthday. I’m so sorry you’ve reached an age where pop culture marketers are no longer targeting you.”
Happy birthday! You know you’re old when the candles start costing more than the cake.”
On your birthday, I want you to remember that you are only as old as you feel. But you’ll still always be older than me. Happy birthday!”
Happy birthday. It’s official – you can now begin your quarter-life crisis.”
It’s your birthday today, and I’m once again reminded how old I’m getting. Oh well – enjoy your day!”
Today, you turn 29! I promise to stop counting the years after this one. Happy birthday.”
Happy birthday to someone who is old enough to have had a Blockbuster card.”
I hope that your birthday is the best it can possibly be for someone who can barely function in society.”
“Two older men sit on a park bench. One says, “Joe, I’m 84 years old, and I have nothing but aches and pains. How do you feel?” Joe says, “I feel like a newborn babe!” “Really, a newborn babe?” “Yes! I have no teeth, no hair, and I think I might’ve wet my pants!” Happy birthday!”
Listen, I hate to be the one to do this, but you need to get your birthday habit under control. It’s been scientifically proven that too many birthdays will, in fact, kill you. So give it a rest will you?”
Happy birthday! Want to feel young and thin again? Let’s go hang out with a bunch of old and fat people.”
It’s a special day – your birthday! Let’s go out and celebrate you being one year closer to removing your age from your Facebook profile.”
Happy birthday! Congrats on reaching an age that makes your receding hairline seem appropriate.”
Funny Birthday Wishes
Forgetting your birthday was merely an April Fool’s Joke. Unless, of course, I did remember it, in which case – please disregard this message. Happy birthday!”
I wish you a very happy birthday! Just please remember to tell me how old you’re pretending to be, so we can keep up the charade.”
Happy birthday to a person whose age now makes them cry even more than the day they came into this world.”
Happy birthday to someone who is now taking drugs on their birthday for serious medical reasons.”
I’m so sorry for sending you belated birthday wishes. Honestly, I didn’t think you would live this long. Happy birthday!”
Happy birthday! I sincerely hope that you don’t take this early birthday message as a sign that you might not make it.”
On your birthday, remember this: age is only a number that represents how attractive, happy and able-bodied you are. Really, it’s nothing to get worked up over. Happy birthday!”
Happy birthday! You know you’re getting old when you never walk past a bathroom without saying “well, I’m here already – I may as well pee.””
You know what they say: it’s better to be over the hill than buried 6 feet underneath it. Happy birthday!”
On your birthday I’m going to share the secret to staying young: lying about your age.”
Wishes may come and go, but age always sticks with you. Happy birthday!”
Wishing a happy birthday to someone who should probably start worrying about what the government is saying about Medicare.”
I know you received so many birthday wishes yesterday, but who’s here with you today? That’s right! Me.”
Congratulations on being born a really long time ago.”
Happy birthday!! You only look as old as the last selfie you took.”
Happy birthday, babe! We’re such a great match because you hate celebrating your birthday, and I’m just too darn lazy to plan anything.”
Happy birthday to someone we’ll never have to say “died too young”.”
Wishing you a very happy birthday. You don’t look a day over whatever age you were just a few years ago.”
Happy birthday! Let’s go see Jurassic World. It’ll make you feel less like a dinosaur.”
I was going to send you a paper card, but my Internet connection came back just in time for me to send you his message.”
Happy birthday to someone who has attended more birthday parties for kids than adults this year.”
Funny Birthday Wishes
Happy birthday! We’re so glad we can count you among the living for another year.”
You know, they say that age is really all in the mind. The key is to prevent it from trickling down into your body. Happy birthday!”
Experts say that people lose their minds when they get old. What they forget to mention is that you really won’t miss it. Happy birthday!”
I believe you forgot my birthday present last year. I’m returning the favor this year. I’m afraid a Happy Birthday is all you’re going to get.”
Happy summer birthday! Get out and enjoy it while you’re still young enough to not fall into the “high risk” category for heat stroke death.”
Smile – today is your birthday. Be happy and remember that things could be worse. Just think about what you’ll be like in ten years – yikes!”
Happy birthday! Congrats on joining the 28-years-old-forever club. We have millions of members all over the world.”
Congratulations on finally reaching the snapdragon phase of your life: one part of you has snapped, and the other part of you is dragging. Happy birthday!”